[A part of him wants to laugh. A hollow, quiet, broken laugh at that last sentence: Do you know how important you are?
What good is he if he can't even protect the one he loves most? If he can't even devote himself to his boyfriend's safety, to love him completely, how can he be important? What kind of person is Teddy if he doesn't have his devotion?
No one, that's who, because he's only barely come to understand himself anyway.
But before he can even give a bitter smile, he realizes that that's a small part of him. The larger part, which had started out so little and buried before, is starting to raise its voice and give him more names: Eli, Kate, Cassie, Jonas, Tommy, the various store managers that he'd befriended, the playfully cynical elderly people he plays chess in the park with, the few people who'd be sad on a park bench, only to pour their heart out to the boy who decided to sit by them and listen. He's the teenager who managed to pick up a friend every time he decided to wander the many linear streets of New York, and just one look at his starkphone, if he can ever get past "Mom", shows a huge list.
Who else does he have?
Not just Billy, that's for sure.
"But love is worth fighting for."
So it is.]
I... I don't think I need this anymore.
["I don't belong here anymore. I've never belonged here."]
[action, june 9th]
What good is he if he can't even protect the one he loves most? If he can't even devote himself to his boyfriend's safety, to love him completely, how can he be important? What kind of person is Teddy if he doesn't have his devotion?
No one, that's who, because he's only barely come to understand himself anyway.
But before he can even give a bitter smile, he realizes that that's a small part of him. The larger part, which had started out so little and buried before, is starting to raise its voice and give him more names: Eli, Kate, Cassie, Jonas, Tommy, the various store managers that he'd befriended, the playfully cynical elderly people he plays chess in the park with, the few people who'd be sad on a park bench, only to pour their heart out to the boy who decided to sit by them and listen. He's the teenager who managed to pick up a friend every time he decided to wander the many linear streets of New York, and just one look at his starkphone, if he can ever get past "Mom", shows a huge list.
Who else does he have?
Not just Billy, that's for sure.
"But love is worth fighting for."
So it is.]
I... I don't think I need this anymore.
["I don't belong here anymore. I've never belonged here."]
Billy...?